Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Why Are Men Expected to Pay For Dates?

Here is something I posted back in 2007. I will add some thoughts at the end. (- Me, 2015)



*****

Thankfully, I don’t have to deal with the dating game anymore, but my children will.

I’m mostly a traditional guy. I do recognize that times change, however. With that in mind, I have to wonder why it is that men are still expected to pay for dates? To me, this harkens back to an age when young unmarried women lived in either their father or brother’s home and cared for their younger siblings, nieces, or nephews, did the laundry, the cooking, and general cleaning, and didn’t work outside of the home or the family business. Their brother or their father was their protector and literally their representative, as women did not have voting rights until well into the twentieth century. Before the automobile culture, men would court women by going to where they lived – which was their father or brother’s home - and spending time with them in front of a bunch of other people – mostly her family members. Until the modern feminist movement, women were still expected to be homebodies or perhaps work as a school teacher, secretary, or waitress until getting married. It made sense in the past for men to be expected to pay the costs of a date.

Times have changed a lot. Women are now in every career field out there and positions of power. They make up the majority of college students. Women have the same access and privileges men do. They earn their own money and manage their own financial matters.

So why are men still expected to pay for dates?

Yes, there women who insist on “going Dutch” at least some of the time, but by and large, women still expect men to pay for dates - even if they make that half-hearted reach into their purse as if they’re going to offer to pay their half - and they hold it against a man if he doesn’t pay for it all.

Why is this? I mean, clearly lesbians and Britney Spears have proven that women can not only pay their share, but they can support men. But we still hear a lot of men join women in saying, “Real men pay for the date.” Why?

These are the reasons I’ve heard people give:
1. It is tradition.
2. Because he asked for the date (whomever asks, pays).
3. Because she spends so much money on looking good for her date.
4. Because men earn more money.
5. Because he is paying for her time.
6. Because he is expected to be the provider, and paying for dates is a demonstration of his ability to provide.

Let’s look at these reasons one-by-one.

It is tradition. As I wrote above, this tradition harkens back to when women were always under the authority/protection of a male and didn’t earn income for themselves. Those traditions are long gone. It is also tradition that sex was saved for marriage. Why be inconsistent when sticking to tradition?

Because he asked for the date (whomever asks, pays). This one is flimsy, considering that men are also expected to ask for the date. My question might as well be “Why are men expected to ask for the date?”

Because she spends so much money on looking good for her date. Yes, and she does that for her own benefit. The more attractive she is, the more and better choices she will have. Men spend money building nests. They are expected to have a nice car and a nice place to live. This is a poor justification for letting the financial burden of a date fall on the man.

Because men earn more money. Men, as a sex, do earn more money than women, as a sex. HOWEVER, studies show that a woman doing the same amount, kind, and quality of work as a man gets paid the same as a man. So, this one doesn’t hold up, either.

Because he is paying for her time. That makes her a professional - therapist, counselor, prostitute… you decide. Why is her time more valuable than his? And if he is paying for her time, she'd better be extremely attentive to him and pleasant with him.

Because he is expected to be the provider, and paying for dates is a demonstration of his ability to provide. He can easily demonstrate his ability to provide without paying for her share of the date. Wouldn’t he prove that he will be a better provider if he is self-respecting and confident enough to demand that she pay her own way and he save his money for investing so that his future wife and kids will have a better life?

Looks the reasoning for men to continue to pay for dates is rather flimsy. Let’s face it - women just enjoy the drinks, food, gifts, and entertainment at someone else’s expense. That’s understandable, but that's freeloading.

Why Women Should Pay Their Half

I can think of a few reasons why women should pay their own way.

1. To avoid “obligations”. Many men expect something for their money. Most men are dating with sex as a goal, even if they are willing to get married before they have sex - sex is still a main goal. Thus, a lot of men lose respect for a woman who is willing to sleep with him because he spent money on her, especially since she has the ability to pay her own way. If she doesn’t sleep with him, then in this guy's mind she is a tease or is just using him for freebies, unless she really is looking for a husband and has made it clear she won’t sleep with anyone before marriage, no matter how much they shell out.

2. For a legitimate vote in the date. If a woman is paying her way, she has a legitimate say in how the date goes. She can ask to go to a more expensive restaurant, for example. Demanding a more expensive date if you're not paying is sheer hubris.

3. To demonstrate equality. Are you equal? Prove it.

In conclusion, women have just as many opportunities as men now, and so they should pay their own way on dates. If you have a good reason why a man should still be expected to pay for dates, I’d like to hear it.

*****

[From 2015]

I think this entry still holds up well. In recent years, I've heard Dr. Laura say men pay for dates (and have to jump through other hoops) because men value that for which they have to work. In other words, if it is too easy for a man to get, he won't value it. So ladies, tell your man that before he comes home, he has to run around the block ten times. That way, he'll value coming home. But seriously, what does thus imply about women? It is implies either that they don't value that for which they have to work, or it doesn't matter if they value it or not. Or am I missing something?

As far as I can tell, there are two real reasons why men are expected to pay for dates:

1) The inertia of customs. It's an outdated holdover from which women benefit. If women didn't benefit from this custom, it would have been scrapped a long time ago. It's like when I carry around an umbrella a week after it has stopped raining  even though it is not likely to rain again for months. Only, in this case, women are benefiting from that umbrella so they aren't going to tell me I should leave the umbrella home.

2) Supply and demand. As unromantic, crude, crass, or cynical as it sounds, it's just another way men are expected to pay for sex (honest prostitution and alimony being some other ways), because the average man wants sex more than the average woman. I'd like to deny this (that it is about men paying for sex), but mulling it over, it don't see this as false. We like to pretend otherwise, but when you get down to the bare bones of the matter, this is ultimately what's going on. If someone can demonstrate otherwise, the romantic in me really wants to see that.

Monday, April 23, 2018

It's Too Late

Suzanne Venker, who has been one of the women who has expressed awareness of misandrist elements in our culture, posted an entry on her blog, which is "for a marriage-minded woman", that caught my attention. The title is "An Open Letter to American Men: Here's What Modern Women Want".

Now, before we get into the body of the blog entry, I wanted to address the title.

A growing percentage of men don't care what a modern woman wants.

The MGTOW movement and similar reactions to misandry have men swearing off marriage, shacking up, supposedly exclusive relationships, and, for many, dating at all.

This reminds me of a story Tom Leykis tells about when he was trying to get a woman to move out of his house. And yes, it was his house. She had no claim to it, by design. In his telling, he takes her to a therapist because she's ignoring his statements that he wants her to leave. In session, Leykis explains that it is over and he wants her out, and her reaction is, "What about all of the bad things he does?"

It's not a negotiation!

This is like when someone decides they do not want to buy any car on that car lot at all, and they leave, and the salesperson calls after him and says, "Here's what we're going to need from you."

We're not looking to buy the cow anymore, ladies. We might not even care to drink milk. Heaven forbid my wife leave or die any time soon, but if I were to find myself unmarried again, I would never, ever get into another supposedly exclusive relationship ever again, and thus I wouldn't care what modern women want. And I'm doing what I can so that other men won't care, either.

But let's take a look anyway, shall we?

Wednesday, April 18, 2018

You Can Be Right or You Can Be Married

Have you ever heard that saying I used as the title of this entry?

Have you seen the exchange written in the picture to the left, or anything like it? Or experienced something like it?

When I got engaged, someone gave me a graph depicting a man's chances winning and argument. It starts at 50%, then goes to 25% when he gets engaged, then to 0% when he married.

How many times have you heard men told that the key to a happy marriage is to learn to say "Yes, Dear."?

Consider this letter from a listener to Dr. Laura:
Winning Isn't Everything

I have been married for 27 years, and I have a few thoughts to share about working through arguments with your loved one.

1.You should listen enough to at least let the other person articulate their issue or point of view.

2.Do not force the other person to listen if they don't want to!

3.Listen to YOURSELF so that you are not ever speaking too loudly, with harshness or even a hints of sarcasm.

4.It doesn't matter who wins - it's how both parties feel afterwards.

Sometimes being a good loser makes you both winners.

The letter is really good right up to the underlined part.

I realize that letter is to be considered by both husbands and wives, but the bulk of these things are directed at husbands. We're told in many ways that we're supposed to simply accept and/or announce that we're wrong even when there hasn't been a logical explanation that even demonstrates the possibility that we are. We're supposed to cater to unjustified or even irrational hostility, demands for apologies, and her claim of control, except where she has inconsistently and temporarily (and often silently) ceded some power back to us.

Tuesday, April 17, 2018

I'm Not Done Yet

Someone left a comment after my entry telling men  "You Don't Need a Wife" and I thought it deserved a response in this entry.
Why do you keep writing this blog?

Because I want to.

It's cathartic.

It helps me think through things.

Other men need to be warned that, most likely, they shouldn't marry nor have children. Some men (and women) have expressed that this blog has helped them.
Women don’t need husbands either.
Great! Independent women are great. Of course independent women don't need alimony or taxpayer assistance, which comes more from men than women, or a man to pay their bills.
We. Get. it.
If you don't get anything out of reading this blog, don't. There's so much else to do. Here's a link to a company that will help you find other things. But my guess is that you do get something out of reading this blog, which is why you have and why you commented.
You’re miserable!
Hmm. Well my marriage ranges from misery to a limited, pleasant friendship of necessity, and I can see the possibility of my children turning out to be monsters, but I'm not generally a miserable person. I find ways to enjoy life, even if I'm seriously hindered.
It’s never going to get any better for you.
It might not. I'm not counting on it getting better "if only I pay my dues" or something like that. My main goal right now is to live long enough to get the kids raised. Meanwhile, I will always think about ways to make life better within the obligations and responsibilities I have.
I’ve read your reasons for not divorcing. Get over it. You’re young enough to restart your life. You’ll be better off financially and emotionally in the long run.
I find it hard to believe I'd be better off financially after losing half of everything, paying for two legal teams, having to pay alimony for the rest of my life, and having to pay child support until my children are through college.
She’ll find someone else. The kids will survive with at least one parent with a healthy mindset.
I wouldn't want my kids around any person who would want to take up with my wife. She has far, far lower marriage market value than when we married, so the person who'd take up with her at this points would probably be a real piece of work. I wouldn't want her to have the kids by herself, either. And I wouldn't wish her, and especially her with the kids, on any man.

Even if my marriage was GREAT, it's still true that most men don't need a wife.

Monday, April 16, 2018

Women Need to be Romanced

Husbands, how often have you heard that if only you were more sensitive, caring, romantic, did more around the home, and jumped through any number of hoops, your wife would be willing to have sex with you more often? Haven't you heard that women need to be pursued and romanced over the course of the whole day in order to get turned on?

Exhibit A, your Honor: A recent letter to Dear Abby.

UNWORTHY IN THE MIDWEST wrote:
I am a 17-year-old senior and have been dating the same boy for two years.
High schoolers shouldn't do that. Not exclusively, anyway. Guys, you don't need a girlfriend while you're trying to get educated.
A month ago, he told me he wanted to break up "because he needed some time to figure out what he wanted."
Translation: "I want to figure out if I want to have another girl as my girlfriend, primarily by sticking my penis in her."
I was devastated but agreed. Two weeks later, he told me he was sorry and he loves me.
Translation: "I couldn't get the other girl or she's not as good at sex or sexually compatible with me as you are."
We are back together now, but the weekend after our breakup,
Hours or days after the breakup.
I went to visit a college girlfriend. We went to a party and I ended up having sex with a boy I didn't even know.
Here are the really big questions, men:

How much romancing did that boy do?
How much of her laundry did that boy do?
How much did he prove that he could take care of her, protect her, provide for her?
Did he ever take out the trash?
Did he ever wash the dishes?
Did he ever buy her flowers?
Did he set up a candlelit dinner?
Did he even buy her dinner?
How much money do you think he spent on her?

You get the idea. He didn't do any of that, and yet she did him.

Somehow, she was able to have sex without any of that romance or helping out. And she's not a freak. This is very typical.
I feel guilty and unworthy. What should I do? If I tell my boyfriend, I'm sure I'll lose him for good. If I don't tell him, I'll always worry that he will find out from someone else.
You're 17! Are you going to go to the same college as this boyfriend?

He has a lot to learn if he thinks she wasn't getting some, especially since he was probably getting some or trying really hard to (or had already, when he broke up with her). Guys, expect that within hours after you break up, she's getting some. Come to think of it, you shouldn't assume  or count on her having only been with you while you were a couple anyway.

Surprisingly in this age of "me too", Dear Abby didn't tell the LW she was raped. Even if the age of consent is 16 or 17 where she was (and we don't know it was), she was probably drinking.

Saturday, April 14, 2018

You Don't Need a Wife

Guys, you don't need a wife.

You might think you do for any number or combination of reasons (you can skip these reasons and go down to how you can have a great life without a wife if you'd like):

1) You're stuck in some mindset that's based on a bygone (if it ever really existed) era. In this mindset, "everyone" gets married, it's shameful or sad if you don't, and husband and wife work as a team with a tidy division of labor, with the wife providing her husband with admiration, respect, support, sex, children, and a "made" home, and the husband providing for the wife income and certain domestic labor, protection, and muscle in raising the children.* You grow old together. Very few marriages are like this anymore. Most women are not prepared to be that kind of wife, and guys don't need to marry to get what they want. The culture in general has changed, more and more people are living more and more of their life outside of marriage, and there's a good chance she'll divorce you no matter what you do.

2) You were socialized to think you did. Whether it was and is your parents, your peers, a religious organization in which you were raised, or the media (especially with the highly unrealistic romcoms), you were told by others that you're supposed to have a wife. But this is your decision to make,  and you are the one who will live with the consequences.

3) You don't have your act together and you think a wife will make up for your shortcomings. Even if she seems to like taking care of things for you now, there's hardly any woman who really, sincerely, wants to be your Mommy and the resentment and backlash will wreak havoc sometime after you sign on that dotted line. You can get your act together and take care of your stuff without being married. See How To Do It below.

4) A woman you're having sex with wants you to marry her. Whether she's your "girlfriend" or "significant other" or "partner" or whatever, she indicates she wants to get married. Of course she does! Getting married has guaranteed benefits for her. But it's a bad deal for you. Don't let her decide what your life is going to be like. If you're just seeing her, the only thing she controls is whether or not she's going to have sex with you. If she moves in, she controls much more of your life, and if you marry her, she'll be almost entirely in control of your life. DO NOT LET HER MOVE IN, not even by stealth. Once she does, she'll be hinting, suggesting, or outright nagging about getting married, trying to tell you that you might as well get married, or getting married will make things netter. She shouldn't even know where your place is, but if you have her over she should never be allowed to spend the night, receive mail or shipments there, leave things there, etc.

5) A woman you're spending a lot of time with wants you to marry her. See immediately above. You can find friendship and companionship with others, without signing a legal contract that is nothing but trouble for you.

6) You think you need a wife for sex. You can get all the sex you want without being married. Being married actually makes it less likely you'll get all of the sex you want. UNLESS... you live by a moral code that sex is for marriage. And if that's the case, you're not having sex already, right? Right? If you want to START living by that moral code, any woman you're having sex with now isn't the right woman to do that with. If you already are living by that code, think long and hard if wanting sex is worth getting married, keeping in mind that the sex could be bad and could be ended entirely, even if you do "everything" right.

7) You think you need a wife for children. Studies do correlate positive indicators for children with being raised by married parents. As with sex, though, you need to decide if your desire to raise children under the best circumstances for them is worth getting married.

When it comes right down to it, most men can't give a logical,  positive reason why they think they should get married.
So don't do it. Stay unmarried.

How To Do It

Wednesday, April 11, 2018

It's Hard Out Here for a Boy

Matt Walsh's latest at The Daily Wire is about the war on boys.

He wrote a surprisingly good intro:
Our culture is very bad for boys. It's bad for girls, too. It's bad for everyone. But I think we fail to recognize and appreciate the unique struggles that boys face. Partly we fail to recognize it because we are too busy worrying about the Patriarchy's persecution of women. Partly we fail to recognize it because, collectively, we just don't care that much about boys. Partly we fail to recognize it because men are not as likely to talk about their own plight. And partly a man will not talk about it because everyone, even his fellow men, will only laugh at him and downplay the problem.
Exactly.
Men are told about their privilege, but if you look at things honestly you will not see much evidence of this privilege. On the contrary, you will see several profound disadvantages suffered by men in general and boys in particular.
Hmm. Wonder if Walsh has been hit with some reality lately?
1) Our culture preys relentlessly on a boy's weaknesses.

Basically, it's about how women/girls dress all slutty and pr0n is everywhere! Of course that was first.

Tuesday, April 10, 2018

We Are Not a Project

I found a column by Suzanne Fields at conservative site Townhall. With a headline of "A Good Man Is Still Hard to Find" I took notice.
Women have been complaining since the original Adams family was evicted from the Garden of Eden that "A good man is hard to find."
Whining, complaining, nagging... yep.
Despite radical feminist mockery of the very idea of manliness, that men are natural sexual predators, most women -- with very few exceptions -- still want one.
Of course they do! It's nice to have the cash flow, the bodyguard, an errand boy, and a receptacle for your whines and gripes and thoughts.
The #MeToo movement has nevertheless changed a lot of things in the wake of the sexual harassment-scandal season. One of them is the regard in which men are universally held by women. It often seems we're back to the '80s, when there was a similar assault on the idea of manhood and some women decried all sex as rape.
Radical feminist activists Catherine MacKinnon and Andrea Dworkin were widely credited with saying that "all sex is rape" and "all men are rapists." They both deny the statements, but Dworkin conceded that she did say, "Penetrative intercourse is, by its nature, violent."
No wonder men are choosing to To Their Own Way (see MGTOW).

Friday, April 06, 2018

Thursday, April 05, 2018

Should The Rock Put a Rock On It?

Good ol' WBW got an opinion published in USA Today today. In it, he urges Dwayne Johnson to marry. Johnson is a pretty smart guy. He was smart enough to move on from being a full-time pro wrestler, which is an extremely grueling and harmful line of work, to primarily work as a headline movie star, a line of work where animators and stuntmen do the heavy lifting and you get your own posh trailer and dedicated assistants while working and the whole production centers around your schedule and requirements.
And plenty of others are born to unmarried people who aren't bothering to shack up.
But theirs is not an example that should be imitated.
His career success is.

It Is NOT a Public Health Crisis

The latest tactic (or, at least, the latest that I've noticed) of "anti-porn" activists is claiming it is a "public health crisis" and seeking to have it declared as such by governments. Doing things like this might rile up the people who already agree with them, but it makes them look extremely foolish and lessens their credibility. It's also feeds a problematic trend, as David Boaz of the Cato Institute points out so well here.

Tactics matter. The tactics used  to get what you want can also be used by others to get what they want. Live by the sword, die by the sword. Hmm, here have I heard that expression before?

Boaz leads off with what prompted him to write:
A Republican National Convention platform committee has declared pornography “a public health crisis.” Committee members don’t seem to know what “public health” means.
Lately it’s been liberal Democrats who have applied the “public health” label to everything they don’t like — smoking, obesity, venereal disease, motorcycle accidents, and more. They see “public health” as a blank check for government action.
Exactly. By claiming it is a "public health crisis" the people who pushed for this to be in the party platform are hoping they can make this an exception to the desire for smaller government. Here's the danger to the party: Millions of people view porn and then don't perceive there to be any problem as a result, so when a party platform calls it a public health crisis, they think the party leaders are being stupid.

Saturday, March 31, 2018

Exiting a Relationship With a Single Mother or a Childless Shack Up


Introduction

So you've either been woken out of your stupor or the slow-building discontent has finally become too intense, and you're ready to get out of your relationship with a single mother or a childless shack up. Being with a single mother* or living with a woman brings all sorts of complications and risks. So depending on how deep you're in, there are going to be different considerations.

Men who are NOT in such relationships should read this, too, to be informed about just how much trouble being in, and getting out of, such relationships can be, so they'll be motivated to avoid them.

How deep are you in?

If you married this woman (which would mean she's not a single mother anymore) and made a baby or babies with her, that's the worst of all scenarios, especially if you have adopted her children. Unless she is abusing you or the kids, the the best thing for the children is usually to stay put and be polite and as pleasant as possible until the youngest child is 18. The problem with that, is, in some places, like the state I live in, being married for ten years or "close enough" means you'll be paying lifetime alimony to her. The bulk of this entry is addressed to guys who haven't married the woman and haven't legally adopted her children.

You need an exit plan for your own self-preservation. If she or anyone else accuses you of not being a "real man" or that you're somehow lesser because you don't want to put up with mistreatment or someone else's responsibilities any more, just let it roll off your back. Who cares what they say? This is what they're saying, when you get right down to it. "You should spend your time, money, and energy doing things for me/her so I/she can spend  more of my/her own time, money, and energy on my/herself." She might cite things she does for you, and even if she does do those things, it doesn't matter. You're not obligated to stay with her, and you can either get by without those things or get them for a lot less money, time, and effort, or with someone who is more compatible with you and brings fewer negatives to the situation. You may have some emotional discomfort over the breakup, but that would fall entirely in the realm of normal, because the relationship became familiar to you and part of your routine. The discomfort will go away and it is better in the long run to be out of that relationship.

Wednesday, March 28, 2018

Play Ball?

Katherine Blakeman wrote at Townhall to blast Sports Illustrated and praise someone who is harassing his employees, because sexy women make her feel insecure, or something.
This defensive article is not too surprising since Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition is nothing more than the peddling of hypersexualized, objectifying nude or nearly nude images of women—it's their most financially profitable issue of the year.
"Hypersexualized" is her opinion. A lot of people would disagree.

"Objectifying" is a word I wonder if she or most of the women reading this piece can explain without looking it up. All media is objectifying. And yes, men look at women as sex objects. If it weren't so, none of us would be here. Women look at men as success objects. 

But with this article, Sports Illustrated is criticizing the smart decision by Kansas City Royals General Manager Dayton Moore to educate his team on the detrimental impacts of pornography consumption.
I haven't read the article. I haven't even clicked on it. Subjecting his players to what is likely hysterical panic about depictions of nudity and sex is silly and smacks of sexual harassment.

Does Blakeman have a clue what life is like for professional baseball players in the Major League? Young, hot women are constantly throwing themselves at these players, many of the women hoping to get pregnant by the players. Unless the players are especially restrained, they are having casual sex right and left with a variety of women. They could be doing far worse than spending their time, energy, and semen on porn. Want to lecture them about their penises? Tell them to get vasectomies, use condoms, and not let their penis prompt them to marry, and certainly not without the tightest prenup possible.

Today's Dear Abby is Exhibit A For Why Men Shouldn't Marry

Here it is. Today's Dear Abby column.
I have been married for four months. My husband and I love each other very much.
Awwwwwww. How sweet!
Although he has asked me multiple times for sex, we have only made love twice.
EJECT! EJECT! He needs to bail NOW, no matter how much money he spent on the wedding, the honeymoon, and everything else so she could have her narcissistic moments. If he's like most men, he shouldn't have married in the first place.

But wait... I'm sure some of you are thinking he's just not jumping through enough hoops. If only he was a better, more romantic lover, right? Yeah, well read on...
My problem is, sex doesn't interest me. In fact, the thought of it terrifies me.
What did she think she was doing by getting married?!? She was thinking she was going to have her bills paid. A live-in bodyguard. An attention slave.
I hate saying no because I know it hurts him, but I'm always scared that I won't enjoy it.
So according to present-day standards, he's raped her twice. Don't marry, guys! It's a burden on women.
I have apologized almost every time I turn him down. He always says I don't need to be sorry and we'll only do it when I'm comfortable, but I'm scared I might not ever be comfortable with it.
And does he go for a drive or lock himself in the bathroom for a while after he says that? This is also the kind of woman who would pitch a fit if she found out he was masturbating to porn and would tell her family, her friends, the Bible study group, her pastor, and she would insist he's a cheater who needs to go to rehab and put filtering and "accountability" software on his devices.
Plus I have doubts that I've ever had an orgasm.
She she's never masturbated to orgasm.

THIS IS THE RISK OF "WAITING". Yes, there are risks. This is one of them. I specifically asked my wife, before we married, if she was able to give herself orgasms for this very reason. Still ended up being a disaster, but at least I tried.
How should I approach this?
1) Admit you have perpetrated a fraud.

2) File for annulment or divorce. Insist that he doesn't owe you anything. Don't make him pay for lawyers, pay alimony, or anything like that. Let him keep/take what he wants. If he wants to stay where you live, you move out. Give him the ring back if he provided it.

3) Pay him back for whatever he spent on the wedding, even if this takes you a while.

4) Either avoid relationships, find a gay man who wants a beard, or get some serious therapy/medical attention.

Sunday, March 25, 2018

Most Men Shouldn’t Marry Nor Have Children

Most men shouldn’t marry nor have children, so most boys should not be raised with the assumption that they will or should marry, and they definitely shouldn’t be raised with the assumption that they will have a lasting, happy marriage.

I realize there are religions out there that pretty much mandate people marry and try to have children. I can’t argue with every different religious organization that claims to have authority over your life. What I do know is that the Bible, taken as a whole and rightly divided, does not mandate you marry and have children. Don’t tell me contraception, tubal ligations, hysterectomies, and vasectomies are wrong because they are are unnatural, as you accept artificial medical treatments, live in a home that has been constructed, and drink water and eat food that has been processed in some way.

Most men shouldn’t marry or have children because 1) they aren’t suited to it, 2) aren’t positioned to do it, 3) aren’t living in a culture that supports it, and 4) won’t find a suitable woman with whom they could.

Thursday, March 22, 2018

Another Reminder I Got More Sex When I Was Unmarried

Despite my wife having recently said she wants us to have sex twice per week (I told her, in response, I'd like it every other day), we're still around once every three to four weeks. There are many reasons this is so, but it is a good example of how women SAY they want something a certain way, but then will BEHAVE in ways that say otherwise.